Fortunately, Kaylee gives Brandon and I many reasons to smile and laugh in the midst of the stress. In fact, she has been quite giggly recently, and there has been a situation or two that has had Brandon and I almost rolling on the floor. One such moment was when Brandon and I were eating dinner the other night. I was holding Kaylee in my lap because she was a bit fussy. I looked up for about five seconds only to look back down and find a little hand with a death grip on one of my pieces of steak, the juices oozing out between the cracks in her fingers. She had pulled the steak to her mouth, but was unsuccessful in getting it in, thanks to the pacifier that she was banging her treasure against.
She is a fun little girl, who is learning and changing a lot. In fact, I was thinking about that the other day. A year ago, we had an ultrasound to find out if Kaylee was a girl or a boy and she was about 3 inches long. So, in just under a year, she has grown around two feet!!! That is a lot of change. : ) What an amazing creation (and Creator). Glad I have been a part of it all.
In other news... this past month, Brandon's life has been quite busy with school and work. These past eight weeks, Brandon has been working on a course that revolves around evangelism. God has grown him and challenged him a lot through this which has been an awesome process to watch. His urgency, conviction, and passion for sharing Christ's love and gospel has been uplifting. In fact, I have been thankful for many of the things I have learned alongside him and seen him delve into through this master's degree. I'm grateful (even though I sometimes complain about the time it takes away from our family) that he has the opportunity and desire to study these things.
As I mentioned above, we have been stretched this month from many varying inputs; Brandon's class being one of them. I am thankful for growth but sometimes think about how it would just be easier to live in my own little world, right where I am at. I live that way at times but I know there is a bigger picture. I've realized more and more that reaching out and changing brings an awareness, which often leads to pain and sacrifice. Nonetheless, may we press on. Sola fide. Soli de gloria.
In my life this past month, God has also used things I have read to grow me.
Thoughts and overview from some recent things I've read...
Rules (and duties) can be observed mechanically. Once they become habitual, they can be followed with minimal effort and almost no thought. These habit-forming rules provide a false sense of security, lulling the soul into a comatose condition. What (the Lord) searches for is an "awakened soul" that thrills to be in the Joy of His Presence. We are created to glorify the Father and enjoy Him forever. He provides the Joy; our part is to glorify Him. (Adaptation from "Jesus Calling")
Another reading that I was captured by talks about the amazingness of Christ's condescension which leads to the exaltation of us. He gave us relation to Himself and the Almighty King, so that we can call Him "Abba, Father." Because of this, the reading said "let us suffer no foolish attachment to present vanities to occupy our thoughts to the exclusion of this glorious, this heavenly honor of union with Christ." Let us be overwhelmed by His coming!!!
But we also need to understand and remember another facet of what this relation entails... because later in His life, Christ calls us to join Him on the road to Calvary. "If they persecuted me, they will persecute you."
Once again, I leave it on a somber note, but I like to convince myself that this is being realistic. I don't ever want to present or try to convince myself of only half the picture. Yet... in fact, I have just done so once again, because the road of trials that will be faced here on earth will come to an end and we will be drawn out of the darkness, into the light to dwell in the presence of the King forever. (Bits and pieces from "Morning and Evening" and "Solid Joys")
One aspect of heaven that I recently realized that I am really looking forward is living without fear. I have mentioned a few situations in the past where I have been handicap by fear. And I have identified that this is something that really does affect my life. There is ALWAYS something to fear! I know His word reminds us again and again, that there is no need to fear, but, it is a temptation for me, and therefore, I am excited when there will be nothing to fear. : )
A song that kind of expresses all of what I have tried to share is "There will be a day" by Jeremy Camp (lyrics below)
I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew
But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering
[Chorus]
There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to you always
I know the journey seems so long
You feel you're walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you've walked out all alone
[Chorus]
Troubled soul don't lose your heart
Cause joy and peace he brings
And the beauty that's in store
Outweighs the hurt of life's sting
Well, I think that's it. Whew...
(I shared some of my other recent thoughts in our Christmas letter. If I didn't have your address and didn't get one of those out to you, I would love to send one your way (just leave me a message or something).
Now... time for pictures... (Unfortunately, I haven't been very good about having the camera around this month. I guess that is one of the things that slips by the way-side when things get crazy)
We had a wonderful Thanksgiving with my dad's side of the family up in Denver!
Kaylee and I had fun making these little turkeys for the gathering.
Kaylee has started to roll onto her belly and is sitting up now.
Pretty soon she'll be more and more on the move!
Riding as a big girl in her stroller without the carseat.
She looked so grown up, I just had to snap a picture.
One decision we did finalized this month was the purchase of a motor home. (I named it Yogi : ) ). Brandon loves to roadtrip and with Kaylee only lasting so long in a carseat, we thought this would be a great choice for the adventures ahead of us. (We won't be living in this in Alaska, just on the way there). We are excited about our new little "home" and are working on updating it a little (much thanks to my mom's sewing... we keep her quite busy). Hope to get some pictures of all that later.
Matching fun : )
Kaylee and I in our coordinating outfits made by my mom
Another AWESOME gift to our family this past month was a photo session with my brother. His talent is amazing and we are grateful he captured some special pictures to have and share from this stage of life.
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